Tag Archive for: child custody

Primary Caretaker Designation and Custody

Wisconsin parents who are considering a divorce should be aware of how a preference for the primary caretaker can affect custody arrangements. While joint physical custody is often seen as the ideal scenario, the preference is usually given to the child’s primary caretaker. The primary caretaker standard emphasizes the importance of the relationship between a child and the parent he or she spends the most time with.

Family courts determine which parent is the primary caretaker by using several factors, including who is responsible for bathing, dressing, meal preparation, making health care arrangements and other aspects of general care. The courts also consider which parent is responsible for helping the child with school work, attending school functions and planning leisure activities. Each of these factors contributes significantly to the parent-child bond the courts are interested in preserving for the well-being of the child.

When both parents have had an equal share in parenting responsibility, the courts use the “child’s best interest” standard to determine custody. This standard considers factors such as the child’s wishes and the physical and mental health of each parent. The courts also consider the stability of the home environment, interaction with extended family and how the custody arrangement would affect the child’s ability to adjust to social changes after the divorce.

A divorcing parent may benefit from contacting a family law attorney for advice on custody and visitation. An attorney may also be able to provide assistance with enforcing an existing custody order if the other parent is in violation of it. In many cases, legal assistance will be advisable if negotiations between parents has broken down.

Troy Aikman and wife announce separation

Sunday, Troy Aikman did an excellent job calling the Green Bay Packers victory in the Super Bowl on national television. He did such a great job calling one of the greatest Super Bowls ever, viewers may never have guessed that he and his wife had separated just weeks before the game.

On January 25, the NFL hall of fame quarterback confirmed that he and his wife have separated. This separation marks the end of a 10-year marriage between the former Dallas Cowboys star and his wife, Rhonda.

Aikman confirmed the separation in an interview with the Dallas Morning News, where he emphasized that it has been a very difficult decision and that he respectfully asks for privacy at this time. He also stated that he and his wife are still deeply committed to their children – they have two daughters together as well as another daughter from Rhonda’s previous marriage.

Aikman and Rhonda Worthey were married on April 8, 2000 in Plano, Texas. While the family had been residing in Highland Park, Texas, property records indicate that Rhonda purchased a five-bedroom estate in Preston Hollow in November, which may signify that the couple had been having problems for some time. In order to keep the details of their divorce confidential, Aikman or Rhonda may ask the court to seal the file or issue a confidentiality order.

During Aikman’s football career, he was considered by Texas Monthly to be “the most eligible bachelor” in the NFL since Joe Namath. He and Rhonda met while she was working as a Dallas Cowboys publicity employee and he was in his final season as an NFL quarterback. Aikman has said he does not necessarily enjoy the life of a bachelor and that he would “rather be married with four kids.”

Source: Yahoo Sports, “Aikman confirms split with wife of 10 years,” Chris Chase, 1/26/2011

Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver announce separation

Two weeks after their 25th wedding anniversary and four months after Arnold Schwarzenegger end his term as the Governator, Maria Shriver and Arnold Schwarzenegger announced that they are separating.

In their statement, they characterized their separation as amicable and did not mention whether they were filing for divorce. They noted that this was a time of personal and professional transition and arrived at the decision to separate together. Many commentators believe that the split between Schwarzenegger and Shriver represents a growing trend of long-term marriages ending in divorce in the baby boom generation.

Many baby boomers with adult children and children in their late teenage years are beginning to explore divorce as an option. According to a survey conducted by the Pew Research Center, 66 percent of baby boomers reported being less than enthusiastic about staying in an unhappy marriage.

Shriver and Schwarzenegger have four children ages 14, 18, 20, and 21. They indicated that they plan to continue parenting their children together.

Important changes in a person’s life can contribute to stress on a marriage and it has indeed been a time of transition for Schwarzenegger and Shriver. Maria Shriver has had to deal with personal loss over the last year. Her mother died in August 2010 and her uncle, Senator Edward Kennedy died just weeks later. In January, her father died after a long battle with Alzheimer’s disease.

Now that Schwarzenegger has left the Governor’s office after nearly eight years, he has returned to his acting career and has reportedly signed on to appear in another sequel to the “Terminator” move franchise.

Sources: CNN, “Baby boomer breakups and the search for a perfect union,” Amy Wilson, 5/11/2011

CNN, “Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver split,” Alan Duke, 5/10/2011

ABC, “Maria Shriver Bore Grief Over Family Deaths, Alleged Affairs,” 5/10/2011

Coping financially when enduring a divorce

When faced with a divorce, it can be extremely difficult for both parties, but even more for the children who are involved. As you face the divorce process, you will need to consider what parenting plans you will put into effect. Even though many parents strive to ensure the child has the same lifestyle as before, it can become extremely difficult in this situation. Essentially, there are two households operating on the same income as before, which can lead to hardship for the parties involved.

Before you begin a long and drawn-out divorce battle, try to work out a plan for custody as quickly as possible. Working together to help make the process smoother will help save both parties a lot of hassles and headaches during the court hearing. It is important to maintain civil and prevent putting the child through any more than what they are already undergoing.

Regardless of whether you live in Wisconsin or any other state, the process is essentially the same for divorce proceedings. The better prepared and willing to cooperate both parties are, the easier the process is for everyone involved. Even though you cannot predict what the future holds in store for your financial situation, you can try to develop a plan that will work best for the time being.

Divorces are an extensive process, which is why it is important to have an experienced attorney on your side. When you have someone who is knowledgeable about the matters of the law, you will not have to worry about being taken advantage of during the proceeding. Don’t face divorce alone when there are attorneys available to help walk you through the process.

Source: Fox Business, “Managing Finances Through a Divorce,” Andrea Murad, Sept. 28, 2012

The Internet and social media are creating issues in divorces

Are you the type of person who posts every detail of your personal life on Facebook? Do you tweet pictures of yourself engaged in questionable behavior? Do you check in on Foursquare everywhere you go? If so, be careful. What you post on social media sites has the potential to undermine your divorce.

It’s become common for divorce lawyers in Wisconsin and elsewhere to share their clients’ estranged spouses’ Facebook posts in the courtroom. Courts have allowed discovery of people’s private posts to Twitter. Things posted online are traceable and are never permanently deleted. More and more often in divorce, legal issues are created because of one spouse’s social networking activity.

Let’s take a look at how this can happen. A picture of you enjoying a ski vacation can undercut your claim that you unable to work due to disability and therefore need alimony. If there’s an issue of adultery in your divorce, you aren’t helping your case by updating your Facebook status to “in a relationship.” Posts about drinking or drug use or check-ins at adult clubs may bolster your ex-spouse’s claim that you are an unfit parent in a child custody dispute.

The bottom line is to be smart about what you post. Ask yourself if you would mind if the post or picture was projected on a big screen for the entire court room to see. If you haven’t been as discreet as you should have been in your past social networking, make sure to let your divorce attorney know so that any negative effects can be mitigated as much as possible.

Source: The Huffington Post, “Step Away From the Computer: Why Divorce And The Internet Don’t Mix,” Jason Marks, Oct. 15, 2012

More common for wives to pay alimony

Wisconsin residents might be interested to hear that it is becoming more common for wives to be ordered to pay alimony to their ex-husbands in divorces. Husbands and wives do not necessarily have the stereotypical marriage arrangements that they used to have in the past. Traditionally, wives stayed at home while the men were the primary breadwinners. Now, however, wives may be the primary breadwinners, or both spouses may earn income equally.

Alimony was originally designed to allow the spouse who stayed at home to care for the home and children to continue living in the lifestyle he or she had become accustomed to. Traditionally, the woman was the one who received alimony from her husband during a divorce. With studies reporting that over 40 percent of the wives who work earn more than their husbands, that trend is beginning to shift. This makes it so that some husbands are, in fact, receiving alimony from their wives rather than the other way around.

Experts say that many women, like men, do not like having to pay alimony to their ex-husbands. This is especially so in cases where both the husband and the wife worked, but the wife simply earned more than the husband. Some people are advocating for the removal of alimony altogether in an attempt to make divorces as de-genderized as marriages are becoming.

Family law lawyers may be able to help people who are going through the divorce process ensure that they receive a divorce settlement that is in their best interest, and they may be able to help a couple negotiate issues such as alimony, property division, child custody, child support and other divorce matters throughout divorce proceedings.

Source: TIME Ideas, “The De-Gendering of Divorce: Wives Pay Ex-Husbands Alimony Too Read more: http://ideas.time.com/2013/05/16/the-de-gendering-of-divorce-wives-pay-ex-husbands-alimony-too/#ixzz2TrG4sEau“, Liza Mundy, May 16, 2013

In divorce, being right does not always mean being happy

Wisconsin divorces often become more complicated when couples lose focus of what might be best for both parties and their children. Some couples concentrate on the wrongs they feel they’ve suffered. The emotions related to these perceived wrongs can be so intense that they only serve to add drama to the divorce negotiations.

Sometimes, the emotions related to a divorce can overpower the couple’s sense of clarity. It is during moments like these when perhaps the best person to ask about the situation is a disconnected third-party who can look at the situation and clearly see what would be best for those involved.

Making decisions based on emotions can sometimes be very volatile during a divorce process, leading to negative outcomes for those involved. Sometimes, it is better to negotiate without going to court. A legal battle over maintenance, child support or the separation of family assets can become costly, both in time and money. Additionally, it can also cause stress and even more more emotional pain. Asking a lawyer for advice on achieving fair negotiations and avoiding lengthy legal battles can be the best way to find a solution that is beneficial for all parties involved.

Because emotions can be so overwhelming during a divorce, couples have the option of filing for a Temporary Hearing to address issues such as payment of bills, maintenance and child support, child custody and even the use of the family’s residence and automobile at the beginning of the process. There are many laws regulating the divorce process, and a lawyer can be a valuable asset to navigate them.

Source: WiCourts, “Basic Guide to Divorce/Legal Separation”

Source: Huffington Post, “Do You Want To Be Right Or Do You Want To Be Happy?“, Debbi Dickinson, June 18, 2013

Prepare financially for life after divorce

People in Wisconsin who have recently gotten a divorce might be wondering how they are supposed to readjust their finances to fit their new post-divorce lifestyles. There are numerous steps that individuals can take to prepare themselves for life after divorce financially. The first thing that they should do, however, is consider whether or not they will be getting any alimony in their divorce.

Alimony is extremely important to some people after they are divorced, especially if they didn’t work throughout their marriage. Alimony might be their primary support system after their divorce. However, they might want to consider planning for how they’re going to budget their finances if they don’t get lifelong alimony since many states are considering making reforms to do away with lifelong alimony and make payments last for a shorter duration.

People who do receive alimony payments might consider using those payments to subsidize their primary incomes. Additionally, they might use their alimony to fund additional education to get into a better career. People might also adjust their budgets by downsizing their homes; chances are that they don’t need as much room as they did before, and downsizing may help them cut utility and maintenance costs too. They should also consider adjusting their budget for their new lifestyle as their income might be less, and getting rid of any non-essential expenses could close the gap. Additionally, people should consider saving money to ensure that they are protected in the event of an emergency.

Family law attorneys may be able to help couples negotiate tough issues like alimony in their divorce proceedings. They might also help them figure out how to equitably divide up their marital assets and negotiate issues such as child custody and support.

Source: Fox Business, “How to Financially Readjust for Post-Divorce Life“, Andrea Murad, August 02, 2013

Taking advantage of social media during divorce

Social media can help or hurt either party in a divorce in Wisconsin, especially if they air private matters that are best left out of the public eye. However, experts are finding that different social media sites can actually help people who are ending their marriages.

First, social media can help someone going through a divorce find quick access to a number of resources, ranging from an overview of ending a marriage, child custody issues and finding lawyers. People can also find information on talking to kids about divorce, handling health insurance and what properties count as marital assets in their jurisdiction. They can check out the reputation of those they plan to hire to navigate through the divorce, such as lawyers, counselors or financial planners. Family mediators also help clients save money when negotiating a variety of issues with their soon-to-be ex-spouse, which in turn leads to less overall stress.

Second, when a parent doesn’t see their children on a daily basis, they can contact them via social media. They can communicate regularly apart from scheduled visitation. This applies even more to someone who works in another state or nation, whether military personnel or at a corporate job. Parents can set up a family site specifically to communicate with their child or just “friend” them on social media. They can look at pictures, keep up with their child’s friends and keep tabs on daily thoughts and activities. Parents can even set up visitation via some social media sites and talk about their activities.

During the break-up of a marriage, people might wonder where to find reliable information on proceeding with a divorce. A family attorney might be able to help clients work out issues, such as alimony and child custody.

Source: Huffington Post, “Can Social Media Be Your Friend During a Divorce?“, August 20, 2013

Infidelity and divorce

Allegations of infidelity have sounded the death knell for many Wisconsin marriages. While some spouses may be willing to forgive an indiscretion, others are unable to move beyond the negative emotions and hurt caused by a spouse’s unfaithful behavior. In those cases, divorce may be the only option. However, infidelity may not play any role in a divorce proceeding depending upon state law.

Many states have no-fault divorce laws, and a spouse who is seeking a divorce need not prove that the other spouse did anything wrong to cause the marriage to end. In most such states the court will not consider a history of infidelity or other bad behavior by one or both spouses in determining issues such as property division, child support or alimony.

In many no-fault states the court will base child support on statutory guidelines that consider the parties’ incomes and the children’s physical placement, not who was to blame for the marriage’s demise. In determining whether to award spousal support, the court will look at factors such as the length of the marriage and earning capacity of the parties, not whether one party was unfaithful. However, if a spouse’s bad behavior affects or endangers the well-being of the children, the court may factor it into its consideration of a child custody dispute.

Someone contemplating a divorce may wish to speak with an attorney that is experienced in family law matters. The attorney may be able to negotiate and prepare agreements relating to such matters as property division and spousal support. If there are children from the marriage, the attorney may be able to provide advice and counsel on such issues as child support and visitation rights.

Source: HuffingtonPost, “A Cheating Heart and Its Role in Divorce“, Caroline Choi, October 01, 2013