Tag Archive for: Divorce

The importance of financial planning during marriage

It is very important that Wisconsin couples make certain that they plan financially when they are married. Making certain to save and to learn good financial decision-making skills can help people to be able to survive even if their marriages later come to an end.

One issue that frequently happens is when one spouse takes on all of the financial duties of the marriage. While that person may learn to budget, pay bills on time and keep the debt in check, the other person may simply not learn those skills. If the person who didn’t learn how to take care of themselves financially gets divorced, he or she may be in real financial trouble later on.

It is a good idea for both spouses to make certain they are fully informed about the finances of their marriages. Each spouse should also try to make the maximum contributions to their retirement plans, increasing their contribution amounts as their incomes also increase. Learning how to take care of financial decisions and building a comfortable nest egg can be very helpful later on whether the couple remains together or ends up divorcing.

Property division in a divorce may be quite complex, especially if the marriage has lasted for multiple years, and the couple has accumulated both assets and debts. Wisconsin is a community property state, which means that a divorce court will divide marital assets and debts equally between the estranged spouses unless the parties are able to agree otherwise. In many cases, their respective attorneys are able to negotiate a settlement agreement that their clients are happier with. Negotiations can usually be accomplished in less time than litigating the issue would take as well.

Social media blunders in divorce cases

Divorcing spouses in Wisconsin may wish to think carefully before sending an email message or making a social media post that contradicts what they have said in court or during property division or child custody negotiations. Family law attorneys once had to rely on experts like forensic accountants and private investigators to uncover concealed assets or infidelity. However, many are now able to get all of the evidence they need by simply spending a few minutes online.

Negotiations over alimony and child support can be particularly contentious, and divorcing spouses may claim that they just do not have the funds to pay what is being asked of them. Such pleas of financial hardship are likely to ring hollow if the spouse concerned has posted photographs on social media depicting extravagant new purchases or lavish vacations. Having accounts on dating websites could also cause problems for spouses who have denied allegations of infidelity.

While many spouses understand that what they post on Facebook may be there for all the world to see, they often believe that their email correspondence is private and secure. Attorneys can actually subpoena this information and even use it in court if it benefits their clients. While deleting emails and online posts may seem like a prudent step to take for those wishing to avoid embarrassment, even deleted data can sometimes be recovered.

Family law attorneys will likely understand the damage that ill-advised online posts can do, and they may urge their clients to ensure that social media profiles and emails match what they are saying during divorce negotiations. Attorneys may also scrutinize the social media profiles of the friends and associates of spouses for compromising photographs or other information that could be used in court.

Dwyane Wade Making Child Custody a Priority

Former Marquette All-American and current Miami Heat standout Dwyane Wade is gearing up for another run at the NBA championship. However, he is also fighting an even more important battle for his rights as a father. Wade and his former high school sweetheart have been involved in a lengthy divorce and child custody battle over their two sons, 8 and 3 years of age, that began in 2007.

Wade’s career, wealth and fame are proving to be a bit of a double-edged sword in his child custody fight. He is facing a great deal of pressure from the sports media and from his team to focus on basketball in Miami instead of focusing on a child custody fight in Chicago. Additionally, courts often wonder what sort of life a single father with a demanding career can provide for two young boys. However, his career gives him an advantage that many fathers do not have. With excellent financial resources, there can be no doubt about his ability to provide for his boys.

In October, when the rest of the NBA was in fulltime practice mode, Wade appeared in a Chicago court to answer many questions and state his case for custody of his children. He does not believe they will be safe with their mother, and he would like to be in control of exchanges of the children because his ex-wife has allegedly failed to bring his children to visitation in the past. “This is not just about the next 5 or 10 years of my career. This is about the next 40 or 50 years of my life,” Wade said.

Wade’s devotion to his children is commendable, and we hope the high-pressure sports media understands that his priorities are indeed correct. Children are an incredibly important aspect of a parent’s life and are absolutely worth the time and effort Dwyane Wade is making.

Source: ESPN.com: Wade making good choices off court; Michael Wallace, 10/20/2010

Holiday Child Custody tips for Divorced Parents

For divorced parents, the holidays can be a stressful experience. All too often, divorced parents cannot agree on who will get the kids and where they will spend the holidays. The arguments begin around Thanksgiving, peak at Christmas carry on through New Year’s Day.

This is not just hard on the parents. Holiday arguments can deeply affect children of divorce as well. For children of divorced parents, the childhood holiday memories many of us look back on fondly become filled with arguing and holiday stress. With holiday visitation around the corner, the Huffington Post’s Stacy Schneider wrote an interesting article featuring her tips to ease holiday custody fights. We would like to share of her tips and some additional tips with you.

Planning holiday visitation is incredibly important and is not something to be left until the last minute. This helps to avoid last minute arguments. When planning visitation, do so in detail. Include every detail you can think of, including pick up and drop off times and locations as well as who is spending what part of the holiday where. Putting a plan in writing can help resolve any miscommunication ahead of time.

It is not just important to plan and communicate with your ex-spouse, it is important to communicate with your children as well. Children can deal better with holiday stress when a plan is in place and they understand what is going on, so it is best to include them in your plans. Additionally, some children will feel guilty when leaving a parent behind on a holiday visit. Having a plan for what you will be doing while they are gone and communicating that plan to them will help to alleviate any guilt the children may be experiencing.

Sources: Huffington Post: Avoiding Holiday Custody Tug of Wars; Stacy Schneider, 11/10/2010

Evansville Courier & Press: Planning, new routines can ease holidays for children of divorce; Davi Stein, 11/30/2010

International Problems in Child Custody Disputes

All too often, one parent in a divorce refuses to accept a court’s child custody decision and takes matters into his or her own hands. With marriages between citizens of different countries becoming more common in the 21st century, the problem of international child abduction can present unique problems.

The most common scenario for international child abduction occurs when an American citizen marries a citizen of a foreign country and they have children together, but their marriage ends in divorce. When one of the parents takes the children to a foreign country in violation of a court order, an international child abduction has occurred.

The United States and more than 80 others nations have signed a treaty to prevent international child abduction, the Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction. International law requires countries that signed the Hague Convention to recognize and enforce the child custody orders of other countries that have signed the treaty.

However, many Asian countries have not signed the Hague Convention, including some of America’s closest allies in the region. According to the U.S. State Department, Japan and India account for more than 300 cases of international child abduction, involving more than 400 children.

Once a child has been abducted to a country that has not signed the Hague Convention, a parent who has been left behind has very few remedies. In fact, one American parent recently spent 18 days in a Japanese prison after a failed attempt to bring his children back home.

There has been progress in many Asian countries. South Korea and Singapore have recently announced they will sign the Hague Convention. However, Japan and India have shown little indication that they do likewise. In our next post, we will discuss the phenomenon of international child abduction in more detail and the efforts that are underway to reunite American parents with their children.

Source: The Washington Post, “Japan, India pressed to curb child abductions,” David Crary, 12/7/2010

International Problems in Child Custody Disputes: Part II

The effects of a country’s refusal to sign the Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction are profound. When a parent absconds with their children to a country like Japan or India even though there is an American child custody order in place, the foreign courts will ignore the previous child custody order and start over from scratch.

While both India and Japan recognize that child custody matters should be decided by looking to the best interests of the child, they have vastly different criteria than U.S. courts. For example, it is accepted practice in Japan that only one parent, usually the mother, should have sole custody of the child after a divorce.

Even some countries that have signed the Hague Convention will occasionally ignore an American child custody order. Last year, a case involving Brazil made headlines. In 2004, Sean Goldman’s mother took him from New Jersey to Brazil in violation of a New Jersey court order. In 2008, Sean’s mother died in Brazil, leaving the boy in the custody of her family. It was not until December 2009 and not until Brazil’s Supreme Court weighed in, that Sean was returned to his father.

Presently, there is a legislative effort underway to bring more pressure upon countries that ignore American child custody orders. New Jersey Congressman believes that the U.S. State Department’s diplomatic approach is falling short of reuniting parents with their children. Introducing a bill that would create the Office on International Child Abductions within the State Department and create a process for imposing economic sanctions on countries that are havens for international child abduction.

Source: The Washington Post, “Japan, India pressed to curb child abductions,” David Crary, 12/7/2010

Closing Arguments Made in Dwyane Wade Custody Case

Our Milwaukee readers will recall Dwyane Wade’s stellar basketball career at Marquette University, which has propelled him to NBA stardom. In addition to spending time on the basketball court, Wade has spent a significant amount of time in a court of law because of a protracted divorce and a child custody dispute.

Wade married his high school sweetheart, Siohvaughn, in 2002. They separated in 2007 when Siohvaughn moved from Florida, where Wade lives and plays for the Miami Heat, back to Chicago. They were official divorced in June of 2010, but a final ruling on custody of the Wades’ two sons, 8-year-old Zaire and 2-year-old Zion, is still pending.

Last week, the attorneys for Dwyane and Siohvaughn made their closing arguments in the child custody case. Arguing before Circuit Judge Renee Goldfarb, Siohvaughn’s attorneys alleged that Dwyane is using his money and influence to portray her in a bad light. They state Wade has focused on his career, and left Siohvaughn to raise their children and the boys have become attached to her. They also believe that Dwyane Wade has no time to raise his children properly, and that he will pay others to raise the boys for him. Siohvaughn attended the hearing. Dwyane Wade was not present, but appeared through his attorneys.

Dwyane Wade’s attorneys repeated their central assertions in the case. They believe Siohvaughn has anger issues and needs psychiatric help. Dwyane’s attorneys also made what appears to be an argument based on parental alienation syndrome. They believe Siohvaughn has manipulated the children, has tried to use the boys to get revenge for the divorce, and the process has alienated Dwyane from his children.

The guardian for the children, an attorney appointed to represent the interests of the children, reportedly took the side of Dwyane’s attorneys. Judge Goldfarb will rule on which parent gets custody within the next 60 days.

Sources:

Chicago Sun Times, “Only truth in Wade custody case: Boys the real victims,” Maudlyne Ihejirika, 1/22/2011

Chicago Tribune, “Closings heard in Dwyane Wade child custody case,” Dawn Rhodes, 1/21/2011

Pentagon supports protecting child custody rights of troops

For members of the military, divorce can be a complicated process. Unfortunately, military life is often difficult, and troops are subject to overseas deployment. Because of the difficulties of military life, many family law judges have been hesitant to give soldiers custody of their children in a divorce.

The Pentagon had opposed the idea of a federal law on the issue in the past, but it recently changed its position regarding to child custody issues for American troops. According to an announcement by Robert Gates, the Pentagon and Congress will begin working with each other to create federal legislation designed to protect the child custody rights of military personnel. They are hoping to create a bill guaranteeing that active duty military personnel involved in disputes over child custody are not at risk of penalization due to military service.

Representative Michael Turner, who has been sponsoring this type of legislation since 2006, was thrilled by the news. He sponsored the Service Members Family Protection Act, which would have prohibited the deployment of military personnel from being used as a factor against them during child custody cases.

It is difficult to determine the number of divorced troops that have lost custody of their children as a result of deployment, since the details of family court proceedings are often not public knowledge.

Some feel that federal legislation in child custody issues will complicate family law in state courts. Congressman Turner, however, believes that federal law is necessary due to the often-nomadic lifestyle of active duty military personnel. The state residency of service men and women can vary depending on deployment and where they live, making it difficult to determine jurisdiction in child custody cases.

A federal law would help protect the custody rights of troops regardless of where they are stationed. Turner believes that American service personnel should not have to “worry about losing their children while they defend us overseas.”

Source: Stars and Stripes, “Pentagon to support bill to protect troops’ child custody rights,” Charlie Reed, 2/17/2011

Nurturing parents help children cope with divorce

Many recent studies have shown that children of divorce are at an increased risk for mental health problems, as well as having educational and social difficulties. However, other studies have estimated that between 70 and 75 percent of children with divorced parents do not have any significant problems. Why would so many children avoid the problems that other children of divorce have experienced? This question lead to a recent study that evaluated parenting styles of divorced parents.

The study conducted by scientists at the Prevention Research Center at Arizona State University suggests that having caring, nurturing parents is more important to a child’s well-being than having married parents.

The study followed a group of 240 mothers who had custody of 10-year-old children for a period of six years. The mothers and their children took part in a divorce intervention program, meeting two hours per week for 11 weeks. This program focused on teaching the mothers disciplinary skills and methods for improving their overall relationships with their children.

Six years later, the scientists contacted the mothers to see how the children were coping. They learned that the children whose mothers who were both nurturing and firm disciplinarians were the most well adjusted. Children with warm, but firm, mothers experienced fewer symptoms of depression and generally had higher self-esteem. Children were also less likely to experiment with alcohol and other drugs when they had a parent that provided consistent discipline.

This research demonstrates that well-adjusted children are the result of consistent, loving parents, and divorced parents are very capable of providing their children with the nurturing environment they need.

Source: Huffington Post, “Can Parents Prevent their Children from Having Problems Following Divorce?,” Robert Hughes, Jr., 2/16/2011

Restraining order issued against Charlie Sheen

Charlie Sheen’s two sons have been removed from his home after his ex-wife received a stay-away against him. Sheen’s ex-wife, Brooke Mueller, won a restraining order against the father of her children after issuing claims that he had threatened her life. Sheen, known for his recent role on the CBS comedy series “Two and a Half Men,” told reporters that he did not know where his sons Bob and Max had been taken after the temporary restraining order was issued.

The star’s recent publicity and this recent incident may continue to affect his future child custody and visitation rights. Reports about the actor’s party lifestyle, rehabilitation visits, and legal troubles could result in the courts viewing him as an unfit parent, causing his visitation and child custody rights to be limited.

The current stay-away order against Sheen prohibits him from being within 100 yards of his ex-wife and their twin sons. According to court documents, Mueller claims that Sheen threatened her by saying, “I will cut your head off, put it in a box and send it to your mom.” According to Mueller, Sheen also punched her and spit on her, as well as threatened to stab her.

Mueller and Sheen separated after a Christmas Day dispute in 2009. Sheen was arrested and later pleaded guilty to assault charges stemming from the incident. He served 30 days in a drug and alcohol rehabilitation facility in the fall of 2010 as a result of the assault charges.

The Mueller-Sheen divorce settlement has given primary physical custody of their nearly two-year-old children to Mueller. Sheen will also be required to pay $55,000 per month in child support.

Source: Reuters, “Judge bars Charlie Sheen from kids, ex-wife,” Christine Kearney, 3/2/2011